azaya | Thistleburr: 3.3

the return of They

last time:

kids grew up, twice
scrampfle became an official star
and grew some wings

first off, a nice family portrait, with everyone present and accounted for!

belizabeth: um

amphitrite: ew, teenagers

yep, teenagers. we still need those three more family friends, so i sent some of the kids to GAYMES to try to make nice.

elusive teenager skyla reappears! quick, make friends with her, celerity!

celerity: h-hi, so, i'm celerity—

skyla: you bore me.

celerity: shit!

belizabeth didn't even bother, she just went straight for the games.

belizabeth: look, i know my strengths. and as an insane, evil gremlin, socializing ain't one of 'em.

fair enough. but i'm still gonna make you.

belizabeth: aww.

eskhind showed up, and avoided falling prey to hedgehog-based raisin brand pyramid schemes.

eskhind: pal, my own sister couldn't get me in her downline. you're wasting your time.

celerity: *cackles amongst the arcade cabinets so as to avoid socializing*

i picked the wrong batch of idiots for this outing, didn't i?

celerity: ...and then the handcuffs said, 'are you going to eat that?'

naphthalene and eskhind: lol!!!

celerity: if you liked that one, i've got loads more with the same punchline!

naphthalene: i DID like it!

eskhind: poked your nose, nerd!

melba: VILLAIN!

eskhind: that melba's a sweet little potato, that's for sure!

then why did you torment her?

eskhind: what do you mean, why?

at the cabinets, three fussy faces wail in unison.

samara: hi, i'm also here though you wouldn't know it, what with the way celerity is hogging the spotlight!

mistem: who's doing what?

looks like esk let her guard down for a crucial second.

llevelyse: ...and then the real magic begins, for the bran-powered hedgehogs burst into full sprint upon their wheels and OH, do the blades of the windmills turn THEN, friend!

inside, belizabeth embarks on a bad idea.

belizabeth: hey HEY there, cutie, is that a pair of horns on your head or are you just happy to see me?

amalthea: you're like, twelve.

belizabeth: i'm seventeen

eskhind: so you can cast a few spells. am i supposed to be impressed? i've got a wand of my own, you know!

heh.

belizabeth went to drown her sorrows in a squirt.

amalthea: well this is awkward

belizabeth: i should buy a hat. or a boat?

mistem: my favorite birthday tradition? why, the s'lad, of course!

samara: of course, who doesn't love a good birthday s'lad.

a whole crop of idiots

lulihart: i wonder how that snorlax managed to get in there.

couldn't tell ya. in any case, we managed to claw our way to three more friendships. hurray!

...is what i said until we got home, and i discovered all three of them were already family friends. fuck me, i guess!

celerity: that sucks! at least i've got this grilled cheese sandwich.

i want a grilled cheese sandwich. i want a grilled cheese sandwich! >:[

faintree: hey nerd, where ya been?

samara: wasting my time, apparently!

oh, right. while they were at GAYMES, i made the additional mistake of allowing them gameboy advances and mp3 players. celerity got right to work making me regret that in the bathroom with the exploding tub.

celerity: eh, it's all the way over there, it's fine.

you are standing physically in the toilet.

celerity: i'm also catching a sableye! so it evens out.

five feet away in the hall outside, belizabeth is also catching a sableye.

belizabeth: nope, i'm playing ruby! no sableseye for me.

the only person in the house doing anything halfway useful is samara, and that only because she's a grilled cheese secondary.

chlora: it's so dank in here.

not your room, so not your problem?

chlora: but this is where i want to LOUNGE!

faintree: there's very few situations that can't be improved with a megaphone.

celerity: so true, so true.

motherfucker, we've ALL noticed that!

meanwhile, in the yard,

sandry: i'm going to ufck her

fernie: dear diary, something smells wretched.

scrampfle: it ams sister star.

scrampfle: i'm amst to fly!

got that dodgeball/kickball chance card for one of the kids, and they ended up bringing home all four of the teen townies that currently exist in teagarden moon.

belizabeth: you know my cat, scrampfle? she fuckin' lost a fight with boots, the world's dumbest yard wolf.

thalia teenfromschool: whoa.

skyla teenfromschool: WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT SCRAMPFLE?!

ezsther: um, who are you?

while the kids crammed an additional four bodies into this already overstuffed house, severance star took a stroll across the street to s k a t e s to seek friendship.

crossandra: i'm sympathetic to your cause, but i don't need any more best friends.

severance star: fair enough. fair enough.

eugenia made the mistake of flicking severance star's nose, and met the bees.

doria: lmfao

anyway, she didn't make any friends.

ezsther: i told my three best friends all about scrampfle and the boots fight!

skyla: how grand!

celerity: t-rex arms, t-rex arms, t-rex arms, t-rex arms!

faintree: so, you thinking of getting your own place?

thalia: this is the right place to stand.

celerity: i can't believe we managed to make four friends today! we're on our way up, faintree. soon everyone at school will know how rad we are!

skyla: bitch, we aren't friends, we just get off at the same bus stop.

scrampfle: whomst are youmst?

hey, remember how the tub was broken?

still is.

this one, too. no one in the house can mechanical worth a damn, so i called the repairfolk.

faintree: look at you go, scrampf! soon you'll have the sharpest claws in all of explored space.

scrampfle: do not condescendst me thus.

celerity completes her broken bathroom gaming set by playing by the downstairs tub, too.

i kicked her out of the bathroom so people could use it, because sims are too dumb to expel her themselves, and she switched to jamming out in the kitchen instead.

celerity: SOON MAY THE WELLERMAN COME, YOUR BRAIN GETS SMART BUT YOUR HEAD GETS DUMB

belizabeth: time to start thinking about getting engaged.

is it?

belizabeth: i dunno. what day is it?

friday.

belizabeth: neat. anyway, *frantic gaming*

turns out three of our four bathrooms were broken! haha! ha. ha. i hate it.

faintree: G-G-GRAAAADES *desperate weeping*

literally just do your homework. just do it.

faintree: NO!

you're gonna drop that thing in the toilet.

belizabeth: you'd like that, wouldn't you?

i actually very much would, yes.

hi sandry! lookin' cute. how're you feeling?

sandry: as strong as an ox and as youthful as a sapling!

well, that's great! and i'm sure won't come back in any ironic way very shortly.

ezsther: oh hey nara, you're still here? we brought you guys home with us yesterday.

nara teenfromschool: dude, that was today, i sat next to you on the bus.

fernie: boat? or hat

still doin' that?

belizabeth: yuh.

neat.

belizabeth: anybody seen gamgam lately?

oh cool, time for the now-traditional missing of the founder's death! i beefed it with zillah gashlycrumb and now i've beefed it with the thistleburrs too.

fuck. sorry, sands. i'm glad you got a fancy tiki drink in the great beyond at least.

sandry: see ya, scrubs! :D

bye, sandry! you were a doll.

lillian teenfromschool: hey, can someone give me a hand? cuz mine's stuck like this.

celerity: who's the prettiest girl? who is? is it scrampfle? it IS scrampfle!

scrampfle: me. :>

did you get permission to use the axe-throwing station?

skyla: 'course i did! who's gonna say no to me when i'm holding an axe?

i regret you.

celerity: the gameboy advance, or me?

TAKE YOUR PICK.

i forgot why i took this picture. probably to celebrate that the tub's not broken, and no one's in here gaming.

nara: do you think anyone remembers we're here?

lillian: who cares? go fish.

skyla: i'm here, too

severance star: EVERYONE SAY HI TO THE NEWEST DIAMOND PIN REGIONAL PINK INTERNATIONAL SALES DIRECTOR OF CONSULTANTS!

lillian: learned how to chess better

it's four in the morning, go to bed!

they: *slap hands in the kitchen instead*

at daybreak, ezsther's back at it.

chlora: samara, please move out of the way.

samara: *gaming intensifies*

faintree: ...but it is getting you a lot of attention from the overlord, isn't it?

belizabeth: you bet your ass!

celerity: all attention is good attention!

hey, speaking of which, go do your homework.

celerity: aww.

faintree strolled up to severance star with 'congratulate' in her queue and i was like oh, okay, she's gonna congratulate her on her promotion. right? of course she is.

faintree: good job learning not to shit yourself!

oh.

severance star: *cackles amongst the apple blossoms*

severance star: thanks for the compliment, nerd!

faintree: AGH

faintree: mom, what the fuck?

honestly, at this point anyone who plays catch with star has only themselves to blame, she's a well-known bean baller.

fernie: omg she's so beautiful swoon

faintree: oh

game started yelling at me about faintree and ezsther about to grow up so off they go to college.

everyone left in the house: scrampfle

scrampfle: mineself!

samara: guys, watch me eat this turkey sideways!

samara: just kidding. watch me catch this electrike!

hate. hate. hate. i hate

perfect place for a romantic cuddle.

chlora: right?

celerity continues finding new and exciting rooms in which to vegetate with her gameboy advance

belizabeth: look, all i'm saying is, these grilled cheeses are great but would it kill us to have a charcuterie plate once in awhile?

samara, chef of grilled cheeses: yes it would.

fernie: hi, blizzy!

severance star: hello daughter

i'm gonna nuke this whole family. just watch.

severance star: i AM having fun in this bathroom!

samara: me too!

celerity: *cackles amongst the scrampfles*

another walkby broke in to bogart the trampoline. cool

yes, you'd better!

or you could do that, i guess! your call!

when whoever's heir comes back from college, we're gonna need a bedroom for her, so chlora gets a bunk in the laundry room.

chlora: this licks.

the rest of the kids went to uni, with fernie tailing behind telling them to be good and brush their teeth and never accept any opened drinks.

first thing i see at UUU-N1? the fuckin jar of dead butterflies. end me.

belizabeth: i'm kinda amazed you made it into college, faintree. i mean, your grades and all...

faintree: bitch? same. i think there must've been a clerical error or something, but i'm not gonna tell anybody.

these two are my favorites, so they're our heir candidates. i almost sent celerity with them, but the siren song of only two sims to manage in uni won out over her nerd charm.

faintree: can i have an $1,800 stereo?

no you can't, because you don't even have that much money since you bitches don't have a single scholarship between you.

belizabeth: lame!

belizabeth: at least i've got THIS.

god damn it.

belizabeth: hey beautiful, can i braid your hair?

lauren: no thanks, i like the braids i have.

well, uni's off to a great start! join us next time, when i toss belizabeth's gameboy advance into an oil drum and set it on fire!

Thistleburr: 3.3

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