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Gashlycrumb: 4.1
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pooklet, whose mighty will I cannot deny.
Xerxes: Is... is it happening? Is it finally happening? IT IS! I'm reaching adulthood! The glorious, shining throne of heirship is within reach at last!
Nope.
I mean, don't get me wrong, Xerk. You turned out really good! I've just gotta go with someone else.
Xerxes: Damn and blast.
Xerxes: I guess only the booby prize of languishing forever in the sim bin is within my grasp. :(
Heh heh. Heh. 'Booby'.
Yusef: *gazes lovingly at Elspeth*
Elspeth: *gazes lovingly at her own rack*
Xochitl: With Xerxes gone, it's down to the two of us! Way to go, Xena!
Xena: Same!
Well, technically there's also Xavier, but yeah, let's not even pretend. It's gonna be one of you two.
I mean, all he does ever is ride around on the roundabout, which is funny, but one trick does not an heir make.
Xavier: WHOOOOOO, I'M GONNA PUKE SO MUCH
Well, it's good to have goals!
Yusef: I too have won the booby prize.
Okay, but that's not... you know, whatever, go ahead.
Xavier: MAXIMUM SUNNIFICATION ACHIEVED
Xochitl: If I'm heir, I think I'll make this face a lot.
Xena: Don't you think that might hurt your case?
Nah.
Xavier: I'M NEVER GOING INSIDE AGAIN
Xena: Something weird's happening to my insides. Is it cramps? I think it might be cramps.
Xena: HELL YEAH, NOT CRAMPS!
Hell yeah, you're fucking gorgeous.
And to the Coffin Bean we go, so Xena can start scouting for a mate, because I don't think Alien Friend was all that interested when we tried dating her.
Xena: This coffee is totally made from real coffins.
Xena: I mean, I guess it could be imitation coffins, but if so, they've really nailed that fresh-ground coffin taste.
You don't really understand what coffee is, do you?
Drunk Sabrina: Meeting new people sucks. That's the whole problem with the world these days. Meeting new people! You should just come into life already knowing everyone. Buy you a drink?
Xena: Please don't. D:
Xena: Hey hottie. Buy me a drink?
Theda Fritter: Hee. All right :">
Xena: I'm lonely and looking for love.
Theda: A cute hunk of lady like you, lonely? That can't be!
Xena: This was a love connection.
Theda Fritter, huh? I wouldn't have thought it, but I like it!
Xena: Books. :|
Theda came by the next day and they made eyes at each other. This pleases me! I always liked Theda a lot in her generation of the Fritters. It was simply her misfortune to be born in the same generation as Winona.
Xena: You know who's just too hot to handle? Giratina Fiebelkorn.
Theda: YES.
Their total agreement on the issue of Giratina Fiebelkorn's hotness was the catalyst for epic liplocking. True romance.
Theda: Nice bed!
Xena: Don't say it's your parents', don't say it's your parents'... Thanks! I was conceived here. DAMMIT.
Theda: Really? Like every member of my family has screwed on their parents' bed at some point, so that makes me feel right at home.
Xena: I aim to please!
Yusef: Strange. I could have sworn I made the bed this morning, and neither Elspeth nor I have been in it since...
Theda: lol
Romance is dancing in your lover's parents' bedroom after defiling their bed.
Theda: Need a push?
Xavier: That's okay! Your hands smell funny.
And this was where I became aware of a problem; namely, Theda was already engaged, to someone else. I had entirely forgotten this.
Xavier: Roundabout, promise me we will be like this forever!
Xena's new bedroom! Because, you know. Heir.
I don't think it was any big secret or anything.
Xena: I have so many people to thank for this honor! First, my duckface.
So I took care of that pesky prior engagement thing.
Theda: Yay!
On another note, less than three thousand dollars, Theda? Really? You're a Fritter. They're like quadrillionaires.
Xena: This time I've got my own bed, baby. We can even hook some handcuffs onto it, if you want.
Elspeth: Oh... that's where my handcuffs went.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Did the mother-in-law curse escape from the Fritters and find its way to the Gashlycrumbs?!
Elspeth: Naw, I'm just checking out that blanket on the bed. Cuuuute.
What're you looking so smug about, missy?
Xena: Just christened the closet.
Did you, now.
Theda: Oh, hell yeah we did. I wouldn't go in there for an hour or two.
Xena: Back for more?
Theda: You know it.
Yusef: But... but those are my handcuffs.
Why are you in your underwear?
Yusef: They are too. I thought it was the dress code in this room.
Yusef: Wow, that blanket really is something special.
D8
Xochitl... you okay?
Xochitl: Fine! Why do you ask?
Yusef: Ah, I see the new girl's making grilled cheese. Obviously, we are destined to be best friends.
Theda: Gurrrrl, you smell fine.
Xena: I think that's actually the grilled che— I mean, thanks!
Theda: I'm so furious about my broken engagement!
Xena: Care for a new one?
Theda: SQUEEEEE
Yusef: I'm not sure what to think of this duvet cover.
Elspeth: Are you girls really set on this wallpaper? Because I have some samples I think you should look at.
Elspeth: Theda <3
I FUCKING KNEW IT.
Theda: smulp
Elspeth: You okay? You need a towel?
Yusef got old, and his hair got dapper!
The girls: *hug and giggle*
Yusef: Zounds, I can't write in my diary with all this affection taking place around me! And I have so much enthusiasm for the written word!
Elspeth: You okay? You need a white noise machine?
Elspeth: YONKLE WONKLE HEE HAW
You guys ok? You need something to do other than stare at Xena and Theda?
What bwings us togeddah today? Mawage, is what.
A member of Theda's extended family attends the wedding, albeit one she's never met and probably had no idea existed. Hi, Whirr Ping Click Click!
Whirr Ping Click Click: Howdy.
Another member of Theda's extended family showed up, too! Christ.
Almond: Too bad I never got to throw a house party in Theda's love shack.
And then I thought things were going to get really awkward, because Theda's ex-fiancee arrived as well.
Velma Pinhill: Yo.
I didn't feel bad about breaking them up, because Velma destroyed Kriemhild Fritter's marriage to Whirr Ping Click Click. So it just seemed fair.
Anyway, there were no awkward scenes.
Velma: Theda! That dress looks amaaaazing.
Velma: could i get a bite of that cake
Theda: *waddles*
Yusef: You two should really consider putting a neon flamingo on the floor.
Elspeth: Oh, hey Yusef. Did you tell them my idea about the neon flamingo?
Xochitl: *is still around, and still really pretty*
Yusef: You guys, there's still no flamingo in this floor.
Yusef: Ellie, they're totally ignoring your awesome suggestion... Ellie?
Elspeth: Who's a cutie, is it you? It is you! Yes it is!
Elspeth: Under no circumstances should we craft the neon flamingo out of real gold.
Yusef: I agree wholeheartedly.
Almond: Hey Theda, is your underage brother-in-law around?
Elspeth: YONKLE WONKLE HEE HAW
Xavier: My... my god, did I really spend my entire childhood on a merry-go-round?
Elspeth: Did I really spend my hot years shackled to a cheese eater popping out babies?
I put Elspeth in the same dress as elder Tomato for awhile, because I completely forgot Tomato had worn it. It's only weird if you make it weird.
Xavier: That roundabout has a lot to answer for.
Really? Because as I recall, no one forced you to ride it every waking second of your life.
Xochitl: Ever wonder if you missed an opportunity by not hooking up with my sister, Alien Friend?
Alien Friend: My name is Ally, dude.
Theda: Mine's Theda!
My sims always seem to cluster in bathrooms. It seems unwise, but what do I know. It takes me hours to psych myself up enough to get out of bed and go to the bathroom.
Xena: Yeah, I learned some people don't like it when you try to talk to them about rocket ships.
Yusef: I am one of them.
Theda: MOTHER OF GOD WHAT A FUCKING CRAMPSPASM WHAT THE BALLSHIT TITTYCHRISTFUCK
Theda: OH
It's Winnie!
Elspeth: you can make your own best friends out of flour sacks, it's quite therapeutic actually
What a cutie!
What a cutie, part two! Adult Xochitl, just before she struck out on her own
Xena: Aw, tiddlywinks.
What the fuck, though? Xena's a sweetheart.
Yusef: Hi Theda, I was hoping to talk to you for a sec.
Theda: I swear to Mammon, if you start in on that floor flamingo again—
Yusef: It would just have so many uses, though! Illuminating the floor, so you never trip over anything! Being flamingo-shaped, to remind you of flamingos!
Theda: Neon Jesus take the wheel.
Theda: Is... is he gone? He is gone? Hot damn!
Is... is it potty training face? It is? Hot damn!
Ceiling sprinkler: IS THE STOVE ON FIRE? IT IS! HOT DAMN!
One small step for Winnie, another small step for Winniekind
Hanging skeleton: *languishes*
Yusef: *maxin', relaxin'*
Xena: *pregnants*
Theda: *good witches*
Theda is a witch, by the way. I don't think I mentioned that, and while some people might know because Fritters, I wouldn't be surprised if everyone had forgotten because her generation was like two years ago.
Elspeth: This is a really exemplary chair. Fine lumbar support, and it feels nice under my bum.
Elspeth: Now how am I to enjoy another chair ever again?
What better place to write in your diary than at the feet of the long-suffering skeleton that has witnessed too much?
Xavier: Yep, this is a big painting, all right.
Xavier: Writing in my diary, looking at big paintings, soaking my sister-in-law with a water balloon! Ahhh, this is the life!
Theda's magical bee swarm: WRONG.
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(Anonymous) 2014-08-25 09:33 am (UTC)(link)I'M SO GLAD SHE CAME BACK
THEDA WAS MY FAVORITE BABY IN THE FRITTERS <3<3<3
same anon
(Anonymous) 2014-08-25 09:38 am (UTC)(link)Re: same anon
Re: same anon
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