azaya | Fritter: 8.4

Hello! I figured I should write out this next part while it is still somewhat fresh in my mind.

Shocking no one, I'm sure, Zola is our heir! And her first action as heir is to... er, what are you doing, Zo?

JESUS CHRIST

I machine-gun clicked on that want to cancel it and immediately banished Almond to the Friend Zone, and then sent Zola to change her clothes because as you will see I can't ever settle on an outfit for her.

She sure is pretty though. *__*

To head off any further Almond-related emergencies, I sent Zola out to find an appropriate partner.

At the graveyard, because where else?

Zola: Hi, Great-great-great... great-great Aunt Swan!

Swan: Hi, descendant whose name I don't know and don't care to learn. It's nothing personal! It's just that there's so fucking many of you.

Beef is present.

Beef: Hey.

Zola: Hey there, hottie. Not only am I cute, I'm the heir to a vast fortune of wealth and magic. How'd you like to marry into the family?

Blondie McCurls: Tee hee!

Blondie McCurls: Just kidding, I'm getting out of here. I don't want to be a Fritter, I've heard about that Almond.

Beef: Welp, that was pathetic. I'm getting out of here before the stink of your failure deflates my perfectly coifed hair.

Zola: *is unperturbed*

The ghosts of Rozz and Vanessa (Gersh's wife) mourn their fallen relatives.

Meanwhile, Zola tries again.

Zola: So I dunno what you're into, baby, but if you're a little adventurous, I got a headboard with handcuffs clipped onto it.

Braidsie O'Blondehair: Proceed.

Ghost of Vanessa: YARRRRRRRRRR

Zola: EEEEEE!

Braidsie O'Blondehair: My, the sky certainly is beautifully clear tonight. So many stars!

Ghost of Rozz: Shameful, Vanessa. Just shameful, harassing our descendants like that.

Zola's bladder proved itself not up to the shock of Vanessa jumping out at her.

Braidsie O'Blondehair: So uh, I think I'll take a raincheck on that bondage... ugh, it got on my boots...

Zola: Curse my hairtrigger bladder :<

Rozz: Chin up, sweet pea. I wet myself once in front of my love and he never shamed me for it!

Not yet ready to give up, Zola went over to the public pool to make use of the shower and clean some of the shame off.

Zola: That monocle is AWESOME.

Okay, time to go home.

Though he was cured last update, Shannon appears to miss being a werewolf. Never let it be said that I am not a sympathetic sim Overlord, so

Shannon: SHIT, I FORGOT ABOUT THIS PART

Miss Pretty: Oh. I see you are covered in fur once again. Very well. I shall not poop on your belongings tonight.

Marriage~

Supernaturals gonna supernatch.

And here we can see where Zola gets it, Chelsea 8|

Zola's bedroom. It's not going to stay like this for long.

Greer: PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEEE

Cerridwen: It's a relief not to be a werewolf anymore, Gangy Almond, let me tell you.

Almond: Yeah, of course... now which one are you, again?

Almond: I have too damn many descendants.

Well, you should have thought of that before you married a legacy founder.

Miss Pretty: Avian creature, come down from there!

Avian Creature: No, I must dance!

Shannon: So, boobs...

Cerridwen: I'm out.

Since Zo isn't capable of asexual reproduction, she goes out on mate hunt number two, this time to the bowling alley.

Zola: You know what's really great, is grilled cheese!

Crystal Sparkle: I agree wholeheartedly!

Zola: I think you're pretty great, too.

Crystal: Hee!

Crystal: I serve a great grilled cheese. Probably because I, too, am great.

Crystal: Daaaamn, look at her!

Jem Sparkle: You're right. That is a hot chunk of lady.

Jem is Crystal's sibling. They're the spares from a round robin legacy!

And this is Karolina from the survivor challenge that I forgot about!

Crystal: This is so romantic! Reminds me I really want to shank that mothershucker.

Karolina: *channels Disapproving Frog*

Crystal: Your plumage is remarkable!

Zola: Thank you!

Zola: Dat ass.

Ginger von Rubberneck: I know this place where you guys can pick up the best lube.

Almond: When I am President, I will outlaw 50 Shades of Grey and instead promote books that show healthy relationships and proper safe BDSM.

Chelsea had a birthday!

Greer, too. And then I moved them out to a nice, quiet apartment, where they can enjoy their golden years in peace. (Translation: I will move them in, decorate their apartment, and then forget them for the rest of time.)

Béla Klint: Hello there, kitty! My, how cute and fluffy you are.

Miss Pretty: Hello there, foolish mortal human. How mortal and squishy and mortal you are.

Cerridwen grew up! And then she also was banished to the void of spareship.

What is it with this family and Carmilla? As far as I know, Zola and Carmilla have never even met.

Almond

stahp

Let's get Crystal over here shall we

Crystal: *enjoys the scenery*

Almond: Hey, hot stuff. I got this awesome little hatchet in my bedroom, why don't you come see it and I'll tell you all about how I got it?

Jesus, Almond, she doesn't even live here ~~yet~~!

Almond: *lingers*

Disapproving Frog: *disapproves of young lovers who flaunt their love in front of everyone else*

Disapproving Frog: *disapproves of adding another person to the household*

Behold, Zola's spouse-to-be.

Behold, the legacy pair getting a head start on generation nine.

Crystal: Man, last night was awesome.

Zola: Yes. Yes, it was.

Almond: This is awesome.

You don't see the banana stand that much because I've got some annoying hack-related problems with off-home lot business that I don't feel like chasing out.

Zola: I don't understand what we're doing here.

Working.

Zola: What's 'working'?

You're a lucky asshole.

Almond: *peers*

Then she started jumping on the couch, and everyone judged her lack of professionalism.

Crystal, too.

It did not kill Almond's buzz.

Almond: Look! I'm London Bridge is falling down!

No one appreciated her humor.

Crystal: I would really like to adjust how hard this drawer springs open.

After work, the family headed over to the Pancake Palace for dinner.

Elspeth: It should have been meeeeee

That... is not flapjacks.

Crystal also ordered flapjacks and they came the right way, so idk why Zola ended up with chirashi, but she didn't seem to mind and I'm just gonna cross my fingers that it's not a sign of imminent neighborhood implosion!

Zola: What are you doing down there? We're engaged...

Elspeth: I'd never sit so far away from youuu

Greer!! :D

Mine is a neighborhood full of femmes.

And werewolves.

Zola: You know what would be really great right about now?

Fucking WITCH SERVANTS

Crystal is confused about how many people actually live in this house.

Hint: it's three.

And Miss Pretty, but she doesn't eat grilled cheese.

Miss Pretty: I only eat the grilled souls of the fallen. With relish.

Almond: THIS IS AWESOME.

Zola: Our bananas are stellar on their own merits, but if it would sweeten the deal, I'd be willing to make out with you a little. No tongue.

Sushi McHoodie: Just a little tongue?