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Fritter: 3.4
Finally, eh?
Eudora holds her lastborn, Almond gazes fondly on the fruit of Nicole's vagina, and I apparently deleted Eudora's hair. Business as usual at Casa Fritter.
Where
Sibyl: Perhaps this milk will give me a dynamic personality that will cause you to love me and make me the unexpected heir.
Perhaps. Or perhaps it will make you temporarily super smart so that you can learn to use the toilet and walk and talk and sing the nursery rhyme all at once so that we can forget about you all the faster.
Eudora: Come on, Sibyl, say 'Eudora'! Yoooouu-dooor-ahhh.
Sibyl: Madam, is not 'mama' the more traditional choice? Your vanity knows no bounds.
Miss Pretty's faces
speak for themselves.
Eulalie: Good God, I have to pee so bad.
Bubble blowing will fix it! Just like playing chess.
The implications of this possible alliance frighten me.
This is a cross-section of their everyday relationship, pretty much.
Bilquis is the most Family sim-like Fortune sim I've ever had. She's all about autonomously taking care of her little siblings. If she's heir her secondary aspiration will be Family since that's one of my arbitrary rules (heir must always be Family primary or secondary), so maybe she's practicing just in case.
Bilquis: *streeeeetcheeeeees*
Beef: Awkward.
Eudora: Look at him, putting away that controller like a champ!
Bilquis: He's gonna be a star someday. 8D
You know, Swan, you're a little young to be getting addicted to— you know what? Knock yourself out. It might mellow you out a little.
Swan: Sweet.
Meanwhile, Sibyl is already addicted to musical apparatus. A karaoke fanatic in the works, no doubt.
Heaven knows we need more of them.
Bilquis: I suppose you're still too young to notice boobs yet, but you will. The eye just gets drawn to them.
Oh, good, this is a super age-appropriate conversation.
Beef: Eww, no. Boobs are gross.
Bilquis: The hell you say!
Bilquis: Ah, but you're just a child. It'll come to you, this love of tits. There's no getting away from it if you're a Fritter.
Bilquis: For your information, I think playing with balls sounds like a lot more fun than boobs.
Beef, at your age, you'd better mean sports.
Bilquis: Well, I can't see the future. Only time will tell. But I'm pretty sure you're going to eat those words, kiddo.
Beef: Yeah, okay, bossy, if you say so.
Hamilton: My life has been enriched in all respects by the existence of this award!
Oh great, this again.
Reporter von NPC: Hi, Ham! What's up!
Hamilton: Oh, you know. Looking at bananas.
Blondie O'Gelledhair: *lurks*
Beef: Your name is Ham? Cool! I'm Beef! We should be best friends! Do you like robots?
Hamilton: Yeah, robots are pretty sweet.
Blondie O'Gelledhair: *disapproves of these young whippersnappers inserting themselves into adult conversations*
Bilquis: Man, don't you love it when the sun shines?
Miss My-Head's-On-Fire: Uh, seriously?
Miss My-Head's-On-Fire: Anyone can see that it's raining, dork.
Bilquis: I was speaking in generalities. :<
...Hamilton.
Beef.
Bilquis: What? They're just talking about sports.
THEY'D BETTER BE.
More I-love-my-townies pictures.
Bilquis: Yay— oof.
Emo McPastyface: Even the magnificence of this award isn't sufficient to save me from drowning in my sorrows.
Emo McPastyface: Why won't they let me into their house? Why does everyone hate me? My life is ashes. ;~;
Hamilton: Jeez, kid, dial it back.
Eulalie: Hi Almond! Hi, Nicole. Just coming through on my way to the kitchen for some pancakes! Not checking up on you at all, ha ha ha. Ha.
Bilquis: Tickle attack!
Swan: I WILL END YOU
Eudora: Outta my way, Bilquis, Mom's gettin' laid.
And this is why your young son is talking to older men about balls.
All of a sudden he is also ~cultured~.
Nicole: *is almost naked*
Almond: Ohh, Sibyl, I bet you need to use the potty, don't you! Don't want you to wet your diaper!
Again, Nicole: *is almost naked*
Sibyl: I call shenanigans, Grandmama! You've never so much as given me a bottle before! This sudden interest suggests ulterior gain!
Almond: *hears no evil*
I try to keep the decorating on the Fritter lot to a minimum since this computer isn't remotely meant for gaming. The downstairs bathroom was too boring, though. Now it's a smidgen less so.
Beef: *is too ~cultured~ to use the toilet*
Swan: I feel that an alliance between us would be mutually beneficial.
Miss Pretty: I am amenable. Perhaps we can talk about this further over a dish of warm salmon guts.
Holy shit what. Almond? Disapproving of Nicole? It's the end of days.
Eulalie: Hey! It's me! :>
With all of the creativity skilling items Eudora's attached herself to over her lifetime, I'm amazed it took her this long to max it.
Somehow Sibyl potty-trained herself! I have no fucking idea how.
Sibyl: Necessity. None of the buffoons in this house pay me any attention.
True, that.
Synchro-peeing.
Swan continues making friendly overtures to dangerous animals.
I'm not sure if this is Widget or Wang but it doesn't really matter, both their names are epic.
Widget, or Wang, the Werewolf King: MY THRONE
Eudora: My lady looks hot when she lavishes attention on others.
Nicole: Whosa goody-goody-kitty-kitty?
Miss Pretty: I WILL MAKE A WREATH OF YOUR INTESTINES TO HANG OVER MY BED.
Then I changed Nicole's hair, but she did not approve.
Almond: I like it. OwO
Yeah, definitely a Fritter.
By 'well' I will assume you mean 'happy', because if you mean 'well-adjusted, balanced, and unlikely to be a homicidal murderer' then I think that ship has sailed, Nic.
See? Already practicing cleaning up after a murder.
Swan: I used chocolate sauce for the blood. 8>
Right on, Hitchcock.
Miss Pretty: *glowers in resignation*
Miss Pretty: WHAT FRESH FUCKERY IS THIS
Almond: So Nicole, about that vacation...
Bilquis: I like the boats! They go places.
Then I changed Nicole's hair back. As you can see, she approved.
Almond: Man I am so high, you don't even know. 8D
No more Tool for you, I think.
Almond: Nicole, you are sweet as an ice cream sundae. I'd like to gobble you up.
Nicole: *forced laughter* ohgodohgod
And now, a series of art photographs entitled "Azaya had no idea kids could give each other electric shocks because she never uses rugs":
Beef: That was awesome 8D
Swan: What the actual fuck just happened? D8
Eudora: I feel like I should intervene, but... hee!
Swan: Oh, ha ha ha, that was hilarious
In all the excitement over the static shock, I'd completely forgotten the headmaster was coming to dinner (because someone wouldn't stop rolling private school wants, Bilquis). But uh. He showed up.
Headmaster Rosycheeks: Hi! I'm here to eat your food and let you bribe me into giving your children a better future!
Eudora: You actually want to eat our food?
Luckily I caught Almond just as she was going to bed and brought her downstairs to cook salmon, since she's one of the only people in the house with decent cooking points.
Eudora brought the headmaster inside and then promptly forgot she was supposed to be showing him around.
Headmaster Rosycheeks: Heeyyyyyy, nice set of bubble-blowing equipment! I'd sure like a go on that, nudge nudge, wink wink. ;D
I give you Headmaster Rosycheeks, arbiter of our childrens' futures.
The tour went really well, once Eudora remembered she was supposed to be giving it. Then we sat Headmaster Rosycheeks down to dinner with the esteemed chef, who was still in her underpants:
Headmaster Rosycheeks: So, Mrs. Fritter, do you enjoy puzzles?
Almond: You mean like, the puzzle of pushing boulders into the correct holes in Seafoam Island to get to Articuno? Sure, I like puzzles.
Almond: You know what I really hate, though, is reading.
Almond, what the fuck, not to an educator!
Almond: Shhh, I got this.
Almond: Told you.
Seriously, why aren't you a witch. It is such powerful dark magic you work.
Beef and Swan had unremarkable birthdays immediately after being accepted into private school. Their thoughts on this occasion are remarkably in character.
Teen Swan! Not quite as outright pretty as Bilquis, but I like where this is going all the same.
And teen Beef. I oscillate between "aww, you awkward little thing" and "me-fucking-yow".
And that's it for now! I leave you with this .gif of Miss Pretty COMING AT YOUR FACE:
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Uh huh, uh huh, nanimoo!
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Also, come at me bro! ;P
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The teens are looking good!
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hi i love you
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/COMES AT YOU
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i am going to le nap in the sun like the cat i am but i'll have my phone if you wake up before i get back in.
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