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Fritter: 3.2
This is sort of late and sort of short (relatively, anyway). Got sucked into Pokemon again, heh. /o\
Exploding toilet welcomes you to this installment of The Fritter Legacy.
Followed by toddler cuddlin'.
Swan: Enough of this affection. We should be plotting how we're going to take care of mother.
Beef: I wonder what that thing is on the rug. Maybe I should taste it.
Almond: You are hot like soup.
Nicole: Why, how kind of you to say so! *best friends!*
Almond: Just as planned.
Miss Pretty has a job in show business. She's the only employed one in the house.
Also, she talked just fine before.
Miss Pretty wins. Also, don't be surprised if a blue-furred dog shows up sometime soon. No, that isn't foreshadowing. At least I don't think so.
So I sent Nicole to bathe Beef. And Almond oh-so-helpfully went and picked up Swan and brought her into the bathroom too. Almond, stop being so Hand That Rocks The Cradle.
Nicole: It is getting a bit tiresome, yeah.
Oh, you've finally noticed?
Nicole: Actually...
Nicole: All I'm noticing right now is my wife's magnificent tits, to be quite honest.
Bilquis: WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME
You're growing up into the most precious thing I have ever seen, that is what.
We're off to a good start with this one!
Almond: Well hello there, Miss Pretty! I think I am going to pet you for the next four hours for absolutely no ulterior gain whatsoever. ...Oh, hi, Nicole, didn't see you there. 8D
Miss Pretty: WRETCH, YOU ARE BLOCKING MY FOOD BOWL
Beef: *is ungrateful*
Bilquis: So I overheard mom talking last night. What'd she mean when she said she wanted to motorboat my other mom's bust?
Eulalie: Jeez, kid. Shouldn't you, like, be playing with blocks or something at your age?
How's working, Miss Pretty?
Miss Pretty: I get to leave this den of failure for several hours each day and on top of that, I am paid for it. I would call it a choice opportunity.
Noted.
Swan: Porcelain bowl, what secrets do you hold?
You don't want to learn those secrets, bb, trust me.
Nicole: Tickle monster, Swan!
Swan: Oh... hahaha... yes, how terrifying.
Swan: This pretending to like people thing is so tiresome.
Poor you, with your one nice point.
Swan: It's cool. I'll just go lord it over Beef that I can walk and he's still crawling. I feel better already.
Beef: I like this truck. Maybe I should taste it.
And now, the first of several pictures this update of... sims on the toilet.
Swan: *continues being superior*
Beef: *continues to develop a sophisticated palate*
Who? Oh. Ill-prepared for the climate townie. I didn't know we even were friends with her.
Almond: Get the birdie, Miss Pretty! Get the birdie!
Miss Pretty: I would prefer to dance.
Miss Pretty: ...On the other hand, if I play along, the crawling ones can't throttle me.
Nicole: ...and I got straight As all through high school, but then once I got to college I couldn't decide what I wanted to do so I—
Almond: I liked it better when she just talked about sex.
This is the first time I've ever used the counterfeit machine! They don't really need the money, but I had a hunch that the animations might be amusing.
I feel that I was right.
Eudora: I wonder where I could get ahold of some handcuffs. On that note, have you seen Nicole?
...I haven't.
Sims on the toilet pictures, two of three. Also, child Beef!
Sims on the toilet pictures, three of three. And child Swan. Now let's never do that again.
Madeover Swan, and a horrific graphic glitch that is kind of hilariously appropriate if you know anything about her namesake.
Madeover Beef.
Beef: I AM SO UNGODLY TIRED, WHY AM I SITTING AT THE GAME BOARD
Because you are your mother's son, darling.
Eudora: Still thinkin' about those handcuffs, just so you know.
I really like this picture, for some reason. The composition and the lighting, I guess.
Nicole paints Eudora's heir portrait, which I neglected to get a picture of while it was in progress.
Apparently this is the update of close-ups of everyone's faces. I'm not sure why.
Swan completely ignores the toybox, except when Beef is also in the room. Then she goes, selects a toy, sits down with it directly in front of the bedroom door, and plays endlessly even though her fun bar is full.
Miss Pretty: I admire your dedication to inconveniencing the world at large. Perhaps one day we shall be allies.
Then Nicole was, for some reason, a chicken.
The Fritter tradition of inviting friends home from school and then abandoning them outside the front gate lives on.
Swan: I don't care for you at all.
Eulalie: *notices nothing*
Yay, homework party.
For everyone but Eudora, that is, who'd already glued herself to the karaoke machine.
Eudora: FUCKING DISHES.
Well, if you can't be bothered to teach your spawn how to do their homework, you can at least clean up after those that did.
Beef: Don't strain yourself, mom, I'll do it.
He kept autonomously going back for more dishes. His neat points? Four. I don't get it.
Now that all the dishes have been cleared, you want to maybe do something about that green cloud of stink, kiddo?
Beef: What're you talking about? I'm going to bed.
Killer.
The bed he's going to is the bottom bunk, by the way. The kids' room got a small makeover for this generation, though it's pretty much the same theme.
Eulalie: So hey, fuck you, Nicole!
Eudora: Our marriage is rock-solid, isn't it?
Never a shortage of karaoke faces in this house.
Almond: Yeah! Woohoo! Right on! Well done!
Who're you cheering for?
...oh.
All right then.
Almond: RIGHT ON, EMPTY ROOM
Eudora: *wisely vacates the area*
Nicole: So here's what I'm thinking. We'll roleplay. I'll be a worker in the red light district, lonely and looking for love.
Eudora: Sweet. I'll be a rogue.
Then Almond wandered in.
Almond: This neon flamingo is so neon... and... flamingo-like.
The bedroom: *has no flamingos anywhere to be found, neon or otherwise*
Eudora: Well, this has gone to a new level of awkward.
Nicole: Huh? Oh. I've gotten used to it by now, honestly.
Bilquis, proactive thing that she is, bakes her own breakfast most mornings.
Miss Pretty: *delicately ingests her morning ration of kibbles'n'bits*
Bilquis: *stuffs her fucking face*
I took a lot of pictures of her just staring at the camera I guess. She's adorable. I regret nothing.
Bilquis: Whosa kitty-kitty-kittenface?
Miss Pretty: The real question here is who is going to find a headless rat in her pillowcase tonight.
Hey guys! Look! It's Harem!
Seriously. Do you ever think about anything else? Do you?
Eudora: Goddamn, my lady looks sexy going up the stairs.
Stop looking up her skirt, Eudora.
Eulalie has maxed many enthusiasms.
Actually playing Pokemon again seems to have burned me out on Pokemon jokes temporarily. But it Absol-lutely won't last. Onix-ly.
Beef wins, morally. Swan wins, sneakily. Nicole does the dishes.
...and then goes to cheer on Almond who really does not need the encouragement, Nic, for heaven's sake.
And with this picture of Nicole's SUPER EXCITED face, I leave you. At some point I may update you on what the spares have been up to, but the answer at the moment is 'not much', so I'm not sure when.
Also, a giant, socially-anxious hug to everyone who reads and comments. Knowing that other people are getting a kick out of my bizarre sense of humor is awesome and ego-boosting. <33
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(Anonymous) 2011-05-18 12:49 pm (UTC)(link)I don't want to sound creepy,so I'll leave it at that,but on a final note:
Thank you very,very much.
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Also, what Pokemon game where you playing?
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Miss Pretty and the headless rat made my day!
*boosting you ego* I love your legacy!
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Pokemon Ruby! Long been my favorite.
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Thank you very much. :D
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And ooh. I never played Ruby, but I have Emerald. I love love love it, even though it always resets when I beat the Elite 4.
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